I believe that our greatest pain is our greatest gift. What we are best able to offer to others is what we have had to struggle to learn or are in the process of learning. My lesson, that I am still very much in the process of learning is Sensing Self. There is a certain kind of life that I want. I want to travel, I want to write, I want to teach, I want to help others and most of all, I want the freedom to be me. I want my life to be a reflection of who I am yet only bits and pieces of my life currently reflect who I think I really am.
How did I get here though? How did I end up in a life in which I feel that not all of these choices have been mine? Certainly, I am responsible for all of the choices that have created the life I currently have. However, many of these choices were not made by me. They were not made by who I really am but that is because I have not brought the real me to the forefront when making many of my past life decisions.
As kids, I believe we often adopt an identity that is safe; an identity that is accepted by our circumstances and will get us through life with the least amount of pain. Typically though, that identity is not a true match for who we really are. And that’s okay. This circumstance is not a reason to lament the past or to criticize others or ourselves. I do believe that everyone is trying to do the best they can with what they know and have at the time.
Looking at today though, we have a choice. Do I chose to be me and if I don’t know who I really am, do I choose to begin the process of getting to know myself? Yes, I want my life to be different in certain ways and I understand that this is a process. How can I achieve the career of my dreams if I don’t know what I want? How would I even know the career of my dreams if it looked me in the face if I don’t have the clarity to know what would be a good fit for me? Or, let’s say I did know what I wanted and I knew how to get it but I was scared of jumping into the unknown or I was scared of disappointing others. There is a lot that can stand in peoples’ way to finding their calling, their joy, or achieving their dreams.
The biggest lesson I have learned in life thus far is the importance of getting to know myself. The more I get to know myself, the more committed I become to making choices that are in line with who I really am. My confidence and gutsyness continue to get stronger as I become more certain that there is something better for me to create.
This blog is about the ever deepening process of sensing self. Like most of you, I’m sure you are often desperate to find a quick fix; to find "The Answer." If only life could be different then you would be happy, then you would be fulfilled. Yes, I get that thought process. I have been there and continue to go there often. I know however that life is never perfect and if we want things to be different we have to live from our Truth. Getting there is the continuous difficult and joyous journey.
Although I am still on the steep part of this learning curve, I believe that I have come far enough to offer some insight into this process. And as I continue to learn, my hope is that my journey will be an inspiration to you. Even better, I’m hoping that with each blog post, through our comments, we can create a community to support each other as we deepen our sense of self and create a life that is “on path” however you may define that.
I know there can be a lot of pain, confusion, despair, and frustration and that the temptation to “check out” can be really alluring. However, getting to where we truly want to be is a process and requires us to be conscious to who we truly are and the effects of the choices we make. After all, this is your life and you are most certainly worth the effort. You are also never alone. Only you can walk your own path but there are plenty of beautiful souls to support you along the way.
Welcome to Sensing Self. I hope this community offers you the support and inspiration you deserve.
May you be happy, may you find peace.